'Chill Out, Take It Slow, Then You Rock Out The Show' (Yes, I Know The Lyrics)
I had a dream last night that Billy Ray Cyrus showed up on the latest "Hannah Montana" episode back in full-fludged mullet mode.
And somehow it all seemed to make sense, or at least made sense that you'd see why he thought he could get away with a ridiculous mullet like that again.
He had been reduced to a punchline. Bu like a well-manicured phoenix he has risen again.
A daughter he raised through that period of marginalizaton and ridicule has become a well-loved celebrity among children -- and in such a way that hasn't left adults wanting to throw up in our mouths quite the same way as when we were forced to watch that mullet tickle Billy Ray's flexed guns during a performance of "Achey Brakey Heart."
On today's popular kids show -- which I have watched more than I would have thought I would in a house of two boys -- Cyrus as both ficitional and real-life father gets to enjoy what must be a sublime experiene: having his beautiful, affable, 14-year-old daughter who obviously thinks the world of him looking at him lovingly as she sings the songs he writes for her.
And the songs today are exactly what they need to be. Songs for children. Which is what Billy Ray should have been doing all along if you think back to what level he was aiming for in the early 90s.
So, in my dream he shaves off the soul patch and transforms his surfer-manboy floppy hair of today and triumphantly re-appears with a magnificently producted Alpha-Male power 'doo.
And he's just looking at me like, "What?"
And I really don't know what to say.
10 comments:
BRC doing a great job of gravy training his daughter's popularity. I mean, he's a pretty good father and a lot more likable than I ever thought he'd be.
I had no idea they were related. Not that it impacts my life at all.
Mullets are hot.
Every time I see Hannah Montana I have this horrible (HORRIBLE) impulse to knock her in the mouth.
Billy Ray Cyrus destroyed the British Working Man's Club (a subsidised institution which sells cheap beer to (at least traditionally)blue-collar workers)
Now we have line dancing nights twice a week...still. How long ago was that that Achy Breaky thing out?
Oh I like Billy Ray..he is one my favs for sure~
Lol. That mullet was pretty much awesome. I have to say.
Who ever came up with the mullet should be forced to grow one and then strangled with it.
Oh boy. The hair. It's even more than I remembered.
Happy Thanksgiving!
-Rick
dear readers
i am here to explain eric's absence from cyberspace.
shorlty after publishing post something incredible happened to eric, something which has never happened before.
aliens from outerspace came and actually abducted somebody with intelligence for once. let's hope when they bring him back they haven't turned him into a tobacco-chewing halfwit.
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