The Reluctant Gladiator Returns
Ricky's back.
For one, this lifelong Dolphin fan is happy. I might be the only one. I can't think of one person -- let alone a Miami Dolphins fan -- who is pleased to see the pot-smoking, yoga-teaching, vegetarian, bushy-bearded, wedding-dress-wearing, freaking-tough-as-nails recluse running back once again wearing the aqua and orange.
(Then again, while there is no "I" in team, there is an "I" in "Eric").
I can sympathize.
(Yeah, that is long. But cut me some slack. I was so pissed at seeing Ricky get persecuted I started a goddamn weblog).
Why is he back?
Well, he does owe the Dolphins $8.6 million for "retiring" just before the 2004 season -- mainly because he was tired of the regimented life expected of a pro football player and the fact that he was going to get popped for the third time for smoking weed.
OK, that's why he's back. The 1998 Heisman Trophy winner doesn't have some deep, burning passion for the game.
But guess what: He never really did. Not in the same way as those who seek glory in the conventional sense.
It didn't mean he ever slacked off. Remember, the man is as tough as Black Sabbath rocks ass (and that's pretty hard). He's always played tough. And I suspect, after his four-game suspension to start the season for smoking pot, he will once again leave it all on the field.
Just as sure as Ricky shows up true to form, barefoot at the press conference ...
... where he apologized for those who were hurt by his decision last year not to play (translation: those who want to win over seeing a man be true to himself) ...
... the philistines pile on.
Why is this? It's like ridiculing fat people and suburban, white soccer dads who can't dance.
It's just too easy. They are the last exiles of the PC-protected.
It's OK to pile on an eccentric, pot-smoking football player. Even if it means not bothering to investigate the complexities of why human beings do what they do, beyond the demands of pot-bellied hero-worshippers who care only about athletes validating their pedestrian lives.
Amid his apologies, Ricky responds to the question of why he returned. The picking and choosing of the depths of his answer is intriguing.
First, the Associated Press:
"DAVIE, Fla. -- Back in the Miami Dolphins' backfield Monday, Ricky Williams made all the right moves.
First, he showed up. Then he reached the end zone on his first carry, smiled at cheering fans, apologized for leaving the team in the lurch, said he was done with dope and calmly submitted to a media interrogation regarding his surreal one-year retirement.
One question -- the first one -- momentarily stumped him, though: Why did he return?
'Why? Why? I don't know. I don't know,' he said.
Uh-oh. This roller-coaster ride still seems a little rickety."
"Rickety." Clever.
Here's the rest of what he said, from the Miami Herald:
"When asked why he decided to return to the NFL, Williams hesitated.
''Why? Why? I don't know,'' he said. ``I've been away doing my own thing, studying a lot of alternate theories about life. To go into that answer would be a waste of time because it can't be picked up in a sound byte or easily understood. So the best way I can think of to put it is that I'm back here to work.''"
Ricky understands the nature of his audience. He understands that, at the essence of it all, they really don't care about him.
He owes money. He's going to play now.
Fair enough?
