'Saying It's All Your Fault Is Just A Sympton Of Narcissism, Because If You Think It's All Your Fault, You Think You're All Powerful'
OK, this is a strange way to get into such a thick subject, but ...
I'm addicted to House, M.D..
Tonight Dr. House met a kid who got into a car crash and died for 97 seconds. It was the best 97 seconds of his life, so much so that he stuck a knife into an electrical socket to see if he could recreate it.
The Dr. House character typically struggles with the existence of God and in fact is written quite witty dialogue in the script to poke fun at God and those who are inclined to believe in God.
So, Dr. House decided to stick a knife in a socket, too. To see what it's all about.
He's an atheist, you'd think. But he regularly shows faint signs of seeking. Which is something.
The knife-in-the-socket-thing didn't do it for him.
Oh well, on to my point ...
I'd be the first to tell you that it's difficult to imagine an afterlife of ornately ordained castles with clouds for floors and streets paved with gold as you listen to praise music focused mainly singing about how we should spend all our time on our knees.
(No thanks, I guess. Unless the other option is ultimate oblivion. Somehow I hold out hope that I could smuggle in a few Rage Against The Machine CDs and launch a battle to change the culture of a heaven like that).
Here's the thing:
I'm not really caught up with that.
I realize that, either way, there's no way around what is known. What's known for sure is that my body will return to a physical state of being a self-unaware element of the fabric of the universe.
What happens when a life moves on? What happens in that transfer of energy? Is the sum total of humanity's capacity for awareness of the very workings of the universe just an intangible idea floating in the ether?
What I know -- and, well, I guess I could say I have faith in - is that there is no good explanation for why it's not possible that there is something more. There are explanations for why it might not be likely. Or whyight not be the sure thing that so many people believe it to be based on poorly formed theological arguments.
I think humans trip over their own guilt and embarrassment when we come these realizations -- that seem enlightening at the time -- that we're really not as important as we think we are.
Indeed, we cannot escape our humanity, such an awkward state of being for a living creature as aware as we are.
But who says we're not important? Because we're such a small part of everything?
The expanse of the universe no longer frightens me. Its magnitude is only relative to my perception of distance and time.
I just know that I'm a part of it.
This is certainly not a new concept.
But feeling it instead of thinking it is new to me.
I look beyond the tapestry of the sky and I see it and I feel it.
And I know this, and it comforts me:
We are all in this together.
Everybody. And everything.
15 comments:
Amen.
There's a strong link here, between Dr House's profession and what you talk about.
He screws up so many times with his patients yet always makes things right in the end (aside from the fact that he's probably got asperger's - or he's just socially retarded)
I've now been trying out this religion thing for 2 years and still finding it stormy seas. It's difficult, having a scientific background, but then that's what your previous post was about. Science can't prove God's existence...but it can't disprove it either.
Great post. What insight. I have found myself many times thinking of the magnitude of the universe and my brain feels with fear and hurts, really hurts and the reality of my smallness.
You are right. We need to appreciate for whatever reason or not, we are a part of this place, at least for a brief moment.
Oh I watch House also, he revolts me but at the same time I am strangely compelled to watch. I must say it is entertaining but he is so obnoxious.
good post today
Great post. I'm here, dammit. We're all here and we all matter.
in a strange way, realizing how small you are humbles you to the truth and, for me, makes god seem so much more majestic. doesn't help believability to know that god isn't a bearded man who orbits the earth?
I know I'm small and insignificant in the big scheme of things. I'm OK with that. In my head, my world revolves around me. As does yours. You can't get past that because, well, you're thinking as YOU. But it would be nice if there was something other than this. I hope that there is. Because I have a feeling I have so much more to give...
"The expanse of the universe no longer frightens me. Its magnitude is only relative to my perception of distance and time."
When I read that, I was reminded of something that's been on my mind since I got into quantum theory. On a scale starting with the smallest scientifically meaningful distance up to the known size of the universe, humans fit WAY up toward the big end. That means that we are so much larger in relation to quarks and electrons than the whole universe is in relation to us. So before we all go around thinking about how insignificant we are in the bigger scheme of things, I like to remember that there's a whole shitload of reality that's way smaller than we are in relation to it all. And anyway, it's kind of hard to correlate size and significance most of the time.
Dude, we really need to have a beer together. We'd solve all the great questions.
Do I need to say I'm kidding?
no escaping our awkward humanity, tink.
mamalujo ... that's an interesting way to see it ... not that things are so much bigger than us, but that there is so much more that is smaller. very interesting.
I just like to think that if I'm not the biggest thing in the universe... I'm at least at the center of it.
At all times, too. Like, when I move, the universe adjusts to keep me in the middle.
Oh yeah.
I'm too busy to worry about the "after."
I'm also having too much fun now.
I'll deal with "judgement" when/if it comes. God can't punish me for not having all the answers, right? Heaven would be empty and Hell would be full of all my friends.
We are all made up of atoms and living on a proton or electron which forms part of an atom.
There is a pig flying past my window right now.
Just because you've solved the mysteries of the universe doesn't mean you can stop writing. One entry in thirty days?? Come on!
the finale carried it.
well said.
is this how your inner monologue really rings?
rusty, while at first it might sound like a joke ... that really is true. it is entirely true that you are the center of the universe and i am, too. which means, i guess, that it doesn't really matter where that is.
cindy, i wonder if the way we really get out of tune with everything is if we fail to seek meaning? have fun, but seek something, maybe?
alkee ... that we are.
nvb ... i suppose i could pull out the old "i've been too busy" thing ... but it's really not true. i'm kind of struggling to come back down to earth a little, i guess. :)
herb ... i'd have to say yes. if i could spend even half my time doing something with the time i spend talking to myself about things, i'd be a little farther along than i am.
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